Moose!

I wrote this a few years ago when I was doing some hot shot driving up in Grande Prairie… this still makes me laugh.


I would always say "I never see Moose! Everyone says they see Moose all the time, and I've seen MAYBE two in my whole life!" (You know "Moose"... Like the two "Canadian" Moose in Brother Bear, not the dude from the Archie comics.)

Last night, on my 12 hour drive from Grande Prairie to an oil rig out side of Grande Cache, I shit you not, I saw 30+ moose! It was like there was a McMoose Family Reunion or they were having their Winter Festival and the meeting place was "The Highway".

I saw baby moose, momma moose and daddy moose! Some where wandering around the road (Maybe they like the "clicky-click, cloppity clop" of their hooves on the pavement?) or trotting along side the highway. Some were just hanging out in the ditch, while others were sticking by the tree line.

They kind of just sneak up on you. It’s the darkest dark when you’re up north in the middle of nowhere at 1 am. I would hit the breaks and yell "BASTARD!" (Or the occasional "Shithead") when one was on or really close to the road. (Sorry for calling you names Mr. (Miss?) Moose, you're cute but you nor I wants to get hurt!)

I think Moose are cute huge bastards, but when it comes down to Moose vs little 3/4 ton Chevy pick-up... Mr Le Moose wins... hands down!

So I FINALLY got to see the all mighty Canadian Moose! I've seen a life time supply of the them!… SO YEAH I'm good... can ya'll stay off the roads now!?