"Maybe he's into big girls..." said a co-worker, after the Crane Operator we were working with showed obvious signs of flirting with me.
Now, I have a wonderful boyfriend, who loves me completely, who loves me for me... I am not on the hunt or anything, but still, after hearing that, it stabbed at me a bit... I AM considered bigger girl, no matter what I do, I can't seem to lose the weight. I'm "lucky" like that.
I most definitely eat healthy. Sure, I indulge a bit once and awhile, like the best of us, but not orca fat indulging. There is NO reason I should be as chubby as I am. I generally make healthy choices, I'm active, I work out as much as I can, with my new career path. It's so frustrating. Fuck off Belly, go away Love Handles!
My attitude changes like waves... For awhile I'm motivated and I am determined to beat this... Other times, I mellow out a bit and love me for me... Then, some times, the anger, depression and the feelings of conqueredness over come me.
Just... so sick of it. I want to be comfortable in my skin, not feel like a foreign visitor. I'm literally stuck fat.
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