Unspoked Ramble.

I wonder what it would be like to see you again.
I wonder what I would say to you, if anything at all.
I wonder if I would long to hold you.
It’s very unlikely that our paths would cross accidentally, but I’m still afraid to see you.
When I think about you I feel that I’m forgetting you.
I try to piece together piece of your face in my mind.
Eyes. Nose. Ears. Mouth.
I have forced myself to completely forget about how your touch feels to me.
I’m trying to move on, letting him in pieces at a time but he’s not you.
He’s not you but you’re not even worth of any of this.

Written January 22, 2009

again

The world
My world.
Endless confusion.
Endless bullshit.
Over in thought, I think.

Forever I will ponder…
Why do people do what they do…
Say what they say…
Act the way they act...
Do that thang they do.

Reason beyond all reason.
Learn from the past
The teacher of life…
Live and learn.
Do and never do again
Say you won’t
Tomorrow you do it again.

Again, I do.
Again, I learn.
Again, Again…
Forever, now.

Written March 18, 2009

no one

I drive alone
To be home, alone
To lie alone
I dream alone.

Alone, I dream of my future.
Things I’ll do, alone.
Without a thought of you.
Alone, I’ll travel through life.
I’ll see my world, alone.

Alone, I will be.
Yesterday
Today
Tomorrow

Forever I will be vacant in heart.
In mind
In voice.

Alone. Doesn’t include you.

Written March 23, 2009

Phht! I'm... hot?

Fally: “WTF! It seems like everyone is staring at me!” *Looks down to see if there is a toilet paper trail or something* “Is there something in my teeth?” *Shows teeth*

Male Pal: “Um no, nothing in your teeth...”

Fally: *Looks around self consciously*

Male Pal: “Dude, it’s cuz you’re hot.”

Fally: *laughing* “Yeah. Ok. Whatever.”

Male Pal: “No really.” *Serious look*

Fally: “Uh –“ *Weird look* “Oh, shut up!”

Male pal: *Laughing* "Fal, really... you 'tard!"

Fally: *Faking a sexy walk with supreme sarcasm* “lyke, i kno rite!”

Male pal: “You’re just going to have to come to terms with it Fal!”

Fally: “Are you SURE there’s nothing in my teeth!?” *Shows teeth again*

Bite TAKERS

When you offer someone a bite of your food or they ask for a bite, for the love of all holy food gods, don’t be the biggest fucking douche on earth and take a huge bite and/or practically half the meal.

This has got to be one of my BIGGEST PETPEEVES eeever. Someone close to me has done this to me for many many years. It pisses me off to NO END. I fucking eat very little as it is, (thanks chubby genes xo) so when you take a huge fucking ginormous bite of my meal, and in a recent case, a bite that you weren’t offered to begin with... imma say it: I WANT TO SLAP YOU!

FOAD.
The end.

Signed,
Starving xo

ps. The last thing I want to appear as it an Orca Fat Food Hoarder... but events like these make me feel just like that. Ugh. MY FOOD. MINE. Nom nom nommm.

Memorable quote from Revolver

"There is something about yourself that you don't know. Something that you will deny even exists, until it's too late to do anything about it. It's the only reason you get up in the morning. The only reason you suffer the shitty puss, the blood, the sweat and the tears. This is because you want people to know how good, attractive, generous, funny, wild and clever you really are. Fear or revere me, but please, think I'm special. We share an addiction. We're approval junkies. We're all in it for the slap on the back and the gold watch. The hip-hip-hoo-fuckin' rah. Look at the clever boy with the badge, polishing his trophy. Shine on you crazy diamond, because we're just monkeys wrapped in suits, begging for the approval of others." Memorable quote from Revolver

Baby?

I’m not the type of person that gets excited about pregnancies... or engagements... or weddings.

“Oh, you’re pregnant... um cool...” I would attempt to insert an “excited congrats” smile after saying this, but it’s most likely fake.

“You’re engaged! Oh that’s SUPER!” Here I would insert a hug and a smile but inside I’m really thinking, “You are fucking crazy!” WHY? Because I know very well, not too far down the road, that I will be saying, “YAY! You’re divorced now! That’s SUPER!”

I receive a wedding invitation in the mail; I’ll stare at it with a blank look on my face. “Oh yay... I have to dress up. That’s just super awesome.” (Don’t even get me started about the excitement I ooze being asked to be a bridesmaid. *blink blink*) (ps. I have had a lot of fun at weddings and weddings can be a lot of fun. If I could wear jeans and a hoddie - or atleast a dress with COMFY shoes. I would have even more fun!)

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not some big chubby poopy stick in the mud. I bleed fun and radness! I am a very happy smiley girl... I’m just REALISTIC. Kids cost money, they make you insane, age faster and in most cases, make you and keep you fat. Same applies to husbands.

No. Thanks.

I DO get excited, I really do! (See what I did there. That was excitment.) As previously stated, I ain’t no stick in the mud! I get excited about lotsa' stuff. New cars, vacations, new hair, losing weight, keeping weight off, dentist-cleaned teeth, antibacterial hand sanitizer, new hoodies, new shoes. I'm excited about the fact that I don't have kids - this is the most exciting actually. I get excited when I get to go to sleep. Sleep is fucking amazing. Sleep wouldn’t happen if I had a kid or had to share a bed with a man that wiggles or snores or kicks or just breathes.

I got a kick out of these following links:
Reasons for not having kids & More reasons!
(Phht, as if I needed more reasons)

Can you feel that? Taste it? Know what that is? Mmm... it's F R E E D O M!

I kinda know that this blog isn't going to go over well with some people... but like, whatever.

i r fally, hear me rawr!
(...and I can RAWR! as loud as I want to because I don’t have a baby/kid sleeping and I don’t have a husband that will tell me to shut up.)